


No cream, no sugar.

by Kimmy



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Coda, Episode: s02e18 Awake Arise Or Be Forever Fallen, Fix-It of Sorts, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Short & Sweet, post2x18
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-01
Updated: 2017-08-01
Packaged: 2018-12-09 20:29:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11676513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kimmy/pseuds/Kimmy
Summary: Magnus comes back home after breaking up with Alec and realises he didn't notice that Alec gradually moved in during the past weeks.





	No cream, no sugar.

He’s a coward. 

 

He shouldn’t have walked away like that, shouldn’t have given up on Alec, not when Alec doesn’t give up on him, not after Magnus already refused the Queen’s offer.

 

He’s a coward.

 

Because he knows Alexander Lightwood will eventually break his heart anyway, and he just doesn’t have it in him to wait. Better to do it himself.

 

He locks his door behind himself when he comes back to the loft, and then locks his heart.

 

He wants to make himself a drink, but there’s a lime-coloured plastic shaker on the bar, a silly gift from Alec, and Magnus can’t bring himself to even look at it.

 

He opts to make himself coffee instead, but there’s washing still on the sink, a single tea stained mug with rainbow stripes, with a bag still in it. It’s Alec’s, like the set of black cups in the cupboard and a pancake pan, because apparently it’s not acceptable to fry pancakes in a wok.

 

Giving up, he shuffles into the bathroom to take off his makeup but Alec’s toothbrush stares at him. 

 

He cleans his face on the vanity in the bedroom and undresses but when he opens the wardrobe there’s Alec’s shelf - a whole shelf of clothes, so he just grabs first boxers and a t-shirt and closes it with a slam.

 

The bed is too cold and full of memories.

 

He gets out and eventually curls up on the ridiculously fluffy carpet out of sheer frustration, the glamour slipping away as sleep refuses to take him and the tears fall.

 

He has no idea how much time passes until the door opens, but he doesn’t register the fact, not really, not until Alec is standing in the doorway.

 

“By the Angel, Magnus…”

 

His eyes are full of compassion and he looks ready to atone for sins he didn’t commit but Magnus can’t do this.

 

“Go away.”

 

“Magnus--”

 

“You have no right to be here. Give back the key and go away.”

 

And Alec kneels next to him and kisses his forehead as he puts the key on the floor, Magnus avoiding his eyes all along until Alec leaves and Magnus can finally fall into a restless sleep full of nightmares.

 

He resignes himself to locked door that night, the way he did 138 years ago, but worse. He feels like this time he will never crawl out of the loft until he finally musters the courage to walk off a bridge. 

 

He feels like this is it, finally, the return to his sad normalcy, all he deserves, an empty living room full of painful memories.

 

But then he makes himself get up, and realises that in the darkness he didn’t notice he put Alec’s shirt on, tears trying to push themselves into his eyes at the realisation. And then he ignores it as best he can, because the shirt of comfortable and  _ just a shirt _ , after all, just a piece of fabric.

 

_ Like acid washed jeans. _

 

But then he goes into the living room and stops, frozen to his spot, because the living room isn’t empty.

 

It’s a familiar sight. Magnus only saw it once before but it’s enough to give him a sense of deja vu. 

 

The wonderfully messy hair, the beautiful muscled body relaxed for once, and yet certain tension and anxiety between furrowed brows.

 

Magnus knows this time it’s not because of years of repression and can’t help but let out a weary sigh, wiping his face.

 

He sees Alec wake up, and blink sleep away and their eyes meet, Alec immediately turning away, as if in shame, but still refusing to move an inch.

 

Feeling bitter irony surround him on all sides, Magnus conjures two cups of coffee and asks with a forced smile.

 

“Cream or sugar?”

 

“Magnus.” Alec’s voice is quiet but purposeful and it makes Magnus’ heart do a weird leap in his chest. His name sounds like a prayer on those beautiful lips and Magnus wants to just curl up in Alec’s arms and ask him to never let him go even if he’s stupid and pretends to walk away.

 

“I asked, do you want cream or sugar with you coffee, Alec?” It tastes weird, the shortened name, mundane, not beautiful enough for the man, whose cheeks are now turning red as Magnus sits down next to him, this time not jumping away.

 

“I know. I heard you. I said… I just meant…” He chuckles nervously and rubs his neck in a familiar gesture. “No cream. No sugar. Just a Magnus.”

 

Magnus’ breath catches and he’s glad Alec had the key because walking out on Alec and locking the door behind himself was the biggest mistake of his life.

 

“I don’t want coffee, I want you.”

 

And for someone who claims to not be very much of a poet, Alec somehow always knows what to say.

 

“Can we forget about yesterday, Alexander?”

 

“What happened yesterday?” Alec smiles and the coffee stands forgotten as Magnus finally allows himself to be held.

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Just remember Malec will get back together and get married in gold and be happy fathers of two wonderful boys and a girl! And leave comments. And kudos. ;)


End file.
